Last night we took Daphne to Toys R Us for the first time. I haven’t shopped for toys there in years and years and it was fun to see what was out, decide what we might want to get Daph for Christmas, and laugh at some of the more ridiculous toys on the market. Like this, a pink ouija board:

Seriously? This is taking the “make it pink and market it to girls” thing a little too far. I mean, can you access a different spirit demographic on a pink board? Like the souls of departed women and gay men? Just curious. And here’s another item Daphne won’t be getting. The Pop Tunes Melody Beads Piano:

It plays “The Final Countdown.” Bwahahaa! Who picked that song? In full disclosure I will admit that I have that song on my iPod, but only because it reminds me of GOB’s illusions and makes me laugh. It’s a horrible song and only tolerable on Arrested Development:

It also plays “Message in a Bottle” which I find weird. I love The Police and have that song on my iPod too, but for a kid’s toy? Hmm… The Little Tikes guitar plays “Message in a Bottle” as well, in addition to “Love Shack” and the Jackson 5’s “ABC.” “Love Shack” and “ABC” make sense. Maybe they threw in “Message in a Bottle” to appeal to emo toddlers or the “Urban Babies Wear Black” crowd? Now if it played a U2 song, or King of Pain then I would have told Chris to, “put it in the cart we are buying it NOW!”